A Kick in the Gut

Just yesterday, I was in tears on my couch telling my husband about how I miss working, even though I know it's in the best interest of my 4 year old to stay with him.

A year ago, I would have never dreamed of actually getting to be a momma (especially the instant kind). And here I am, 7 months into this journey. My son will have my last name soon, but for now, we spend countless hours singing, reading, playing, hugging, running, shouting, building, and loving.

Just last year, I had a whole classroom that I decorated and kept clean and ran as smooth as a whistle (if there is such a thing as "smooth" in PreK). I had friends who worked beside me all day every day. They supported me and lifted me up. We laughed every single day. We shared stories, struggles, and triumphs. They were not only my friends, but they were constantly affirming me and helping me to be a better teacher.

And now it's just me and D...and though I love it, I miss teaching.

Enter my newest obsession - blogging. Not so much mine, but reading other people's. There are some crazy creative people out there. Seriously. And I can sit for hours and read random stranger's blogs, their thoughts, ideas, crafts, d-i-y projects, and other mommy-ness. And I feel a part of some community, be it very shallow and full of strangers.

However, today I had a divine appointment with my new favorite blog, I Can Teach My Child! Somehow I feel I might be related to this chick. We're very much the same. And she just wrote this blog about approval. It.Hit.Home.

And though I must hit the proverbial "sack" now, I want to share the verse that kicked me in the gut tonight from my bloggy world:

"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ." -Galatians 1:10

This is so not about me. It never is. And I have my little pity parties on the couch, fully equipped with tears and a truly sad heart (it was pitiful, I'm tellin' ya). But that's me shining through. Yucky, old, selfish and gross me.

I needed a kick in the gut tonight, God. Perspectives that help me focus on You and You alone are just what one needs at times. Thank you...

I'm a dog person...

I'm a dog person. I know what some of you are thinking - WHAT?!?!?! Is this the same girl who begged her parents at age 10 for a mutt named Panda and then virtually forgot about her, whined about having to feed and water her, and never spent time in the back yard with her? The same girl?

Others of you (Williamsons especially) are thinking "Gross!" I know...I know...

I was raised to like to look at dogs. My daddy has a heart for animals...always has. Grammy has lots of stories. But due to multiple circumstances and life experiences, we did not have an indoor dog. We did, however, have Panda...Poor Panda. Enough about that.

I married a dog person, actually, married into a dog family. There wasn't a time in Aaron's life that he didn't have a dog in their home. And there are stories...boy, are there stories.

Enter the ever-lasting argument about indoor dogs. Some people like 'em; some people don't. I had a misconception that indoor dogs made a home smell or dirty. Not sure where I got it, but I did. We have friends that have indoor dogs. Their home isn't smelly or dirty, though I have been in homes that were. I officially think that's due to the owner and not the poor dog, but that's another soap-box.

Aaron & I couldn't agree. Aaron didn't want an outdoor dog; I didn't want an indoor dog. So I would always be denying him and our children of an experience that he treasures from his childhood.

Here I am, 2 years after getting our favorite K-9, Gilbert Rufus Keathley, proclaiming that I'm a dog person! I love little dogs and big dogs. I like licking dogs and barking dogs (though that can get annoying on both parts). I love puppies and old dogs. Seriously. They're so great. What a great companion...Recently, I have met a yorkie that I adore (CJ), who belongs to my cousin.

Anywho - all this to say...Gilbert, though he doesn't speak, is always here for me. When I cry, he sits at my feet (or on my lap). When I sleep, he snuggles up (or takes up most of the bed). When I am in danger (even if it's pretend), WATCH OUT! He sure loves hims Momma...He listens (sometimes), obeys (usually), and loves. He guards, protects, and hunts. He loves...he loves me, Dad, AND our new addition, 4 year old Dillon. They are the best of friends.

There's not a thing that I would trade for this dog. Seriously. He's the best thing EVER. And yes, I have to vacuum and clean more. I have to spray febreeze on our couch. I have to smell his stinky farts, and fight over the spot where my feet are supposed to go in bed. But my life is better with Gil.

I am a dog person. Officially. To which Aaron replies FINALLY. (and who wouldn't be with THIS thing living with them!?)(okay - I adore this pic. Gil actually gets behind people on the couch...as if he's hugging or something. He loves his dad. :-)

My Never-Ending Story

I’m Joslyn. Many words could tell who I am: 29, wife, Momma, crafty, lover of books, crazy about Jesus, family oriented, card-making scrapbooker, friend, passionate, singer, teacher, photographer wanna-be, cook, encourager, adopted. Yes, I said adopted. And though I am all those things, only the people who know me best know that I’m adopted.

And yet it’s not a secret. The world acts as if it’s unfortunate. People say things like, “Oh, I’m sorry” or “Oh, I didn’t know that” in very uncomfortable tones and then quickly change the subject. Others have questions and bring it up like it’s an open wound or something.

And so I’m here to tell you my story. So you won’t be sorry. And so you won’t be sorry from now on when you hear someone is adopted.

First, I want to gander at my favorite piece of literature. Here, we do not shy from talking about adoption. In fact, adoption is the analogy used to explain how one becomes a part of God’s family. When we put Jesus first, it’s as if we get a whole new family! Galatians chapter 4 tells us that

“God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, ⁵ to redeem those under the law, that we might receive adoption to sonship. ⁶ Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.” ⁷ So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir.”

The Bible makes it clear in numerous places that we are adopted into God’s family. And isn’t that the case? How many of you non-adopted people out there are closer with people from your church than you are with your own family? How blessed does that make you feel? It’s as if you were chosen; accepted as you are for who you are and not who you are born of.

And so it is for an adoptee. We are chosen. We are plucked from whatever situation, and we are placed in arms made of unconditional love.

Here is my (hopefully) never-ending adoption story:

I was born 12/8/1980 to Sarah, who was 42. I was her fifth birth child, and I was the third one she put up for adoption. My parents, who had been trying to conceive for 7 years, got the call on the day I was born. Though it took them 6.5 weeks to get to me (interstate adoptions and all the legalities), they were thrilled from that moment on to be my Mommy & Daddy.

My parents chose me. They wanted a baby for 7 long years, and I was the answer to their prayers. They had prayed for me for 7 years; longed to hold and smell those fresh baby smells for 7 years. They cried over it, and they trusted God over it. Ironically, over the weekend they came to get me (1/16/1981), my Mom wasn’t feeling so well. Turns out that’s because my sister, Katrina, was already causing a ruckus in the womb! In the next 5 years, my parents gave me 1 sister (Katrina), and 2 brothers (Jeremy & Nathan). I always joke that I made my parents fertile. J

The 6 of us had a very busy, full life. My dad, Gary, is a Nazarene pastor. My mom, Shiela, is a trained teacher who stayed home with us while we were all in school. We lived on little, laughed a lot, played a lot of games and sports, and celebrated holidays more with traditions than gifts (though we did do gifts, just not extravagant ones). We had family night through much of my childhood and adolescence. We were at church anytime the doors were open. We siblings fought much, and tended to form teams against each other. We picked on my baby brother (sorry, Nate), and ganged up on each other (and sometimes my parents). Though life wasn’t always easy, I look back and am thankful for my large family. I’m thankful for the many camping escapades and sacrifices my parents made for us. I’m thankful that Mom was always home when I got home from school (even though it was kind of annoying at times). I’m thankful for chores, allowances, and learning about stewardship early in life. To this day, my sister is one of my dearest and closest friends, along with my brothers. I never hesitate to spend time with them.

I have had a great life. I literally could not ask for more. And though you may think this is where I tell you that this is it, I’m going to tell you that now I have the pleasure of adopting.

As a PreK teacher in the public school system, I had the chance to meet many fun little people. It is the job God created me for, and I loved most minutes of it! Enter Dillon, 3, on 8/2009. He was sweet, rowdy, and had very few words in his vocabulary. And did I mention that he was the cutest boy ever with the deepest brown eyes? As the year progressed, I continued to fall for this little man. His foster parents loved him so very much but had already raised 4 grown children and were ready for retirement years. Long story short, I had this wild idea that I should raise him! I already loved him! How hard could this be? The next step would be getting my husband involved and on board.

Though I expected opposition from him, he encouraged me to look into it and was willing to do what it took to get our foster license. In turn, we started seeing Dillon more often at our house and spending more time with him.

We got to add a 3^rd member to our house on 4/12/2010. I will never forget that day. To this date (11/2010), we are still in the process of adopting. In the meantime, Dillon is the light of our lives and the joy to all of our extended family. He is still sweet and rowdy, and his vocabulary is limitless now. We do everything together, and we love each day getting to know him more and more. Sometimes we get sad that we missed 4 years and 3 weeks of his life. Sometimes we feel robbed. And yet, when he smiles at us the way that only he can, God fills us up once more.

Adoption is not a curse; it’s a blessing. Adoption is scary, and yet fills so many lives with joy. Adoption is risky, as are most important decisions we make in our short lives. And, in my case, I’m hoping that my adoption story is never-ending. I want my son to value it so much to include it in his future family and so forth. Just as God’s adoption story is never-ending, I pray mine will be, too.

I LOVE him...(part 2)

I know you're all on the edge of your seat from yesterday wondering why this girl loves her some Aaron Keathley.


Today is officially our 3rd Anniversary, or as Dillon calls it, "Kissing Day." That must be all he remembers from our wedding pictures. The two that we're kissing in. That's okay, at least he knows we love each other, right? He'll be grossed out soon enough over all of that...

I do love Aaron more today than I did 1,095 days ago. It's hard to imagine. That day was such a happy and full day. I literally could not have imagined it going any better.

Marriage is tough. I'm not going to lie. And those of you out there who are married are saying "Preach it SISTA." It just is. As my wise pastor says, "When two living, breathing people with opinions live in the same space, there WILL be conflict." Add this truth to the fact that I'm a stubborn, first-born, perfectionist who lived on her own for 6ish years before getting married...we have had a lot of conflict. And we still do. But man, I love that boy.

I love him because he is kind. Almost always, even in the midst of conflict, he's kind. I love him because he doesn't let me stay the same. I love him because he knows me. He knows my walls and why I put them up and when. He knows how to tear them down with kindness instead of hammers. I love him because he knows how to build me up. I love him because he encourages me. I love him because he sees me the way God sees me.

I love him because he puts up with my crafting obsession. I love him because he takes me to Mexican when all he really wants is a burger. I love him because he loves God deeply and desires to do his will. I love him because he is honest with me. He doesn't let me lose.

I love him because he usually knows just when I need a hug. And I love him because he not only knows when I need a hug but the kind of hug I need (because sometimes you just gotta have a hug that's tight and forever long). I love him because he's predictable. He goes to the same 12 websites a day. I love him because he's conservative and passionate about politics that matter. I love him because he is incredibly smart. I love him because he tries to fix stuff before calling someone...and usually succeeds, thanks to the WWW :-). I love him because he fixes me hot dogs on the grill (or my favorite dry rub bbq chicken) any time he has an evening free. I love that my hand fits perfectly in his.


I love him because when I told him I wanted to bring a 3 year old to come live with us and be his parents, he didn't deny me. He let me explore, and then eventually jumped on board. I love the way he loves D. I love how emotional he gets when we think about all that we missed in his little life. I love how D's changed the way Aaron views all things unfair...and all the children that are exposed to that. I love Aaron because he's letting me stay home with D. And on the same token, I love him that he gives me a "break" when he can and encourages me to do things outside of being a mom.

I love him that he watches at least one episode of the Office every single night before we go to bed. I love that he mostly just quotes it because he's seen them all so many times. I love that he watches random episodes now, even though I never know where we're at and if Jim & Pam are flirting, married, or dating. I love that he doesn't laugh a lot, but when he does, he usually laughs so hard he struggles to take a breath. I love that he always has a funny sarcastic remark about most things, especially the subject of marriage to me. :-) I love that he still makes me laugh.

I love that we cuddle when we sleep. I love that we love to watch SNL, even though we usually end up just talking through the whole thing. I love watching him grow in the Lord. I love hearing him speak passionately about growth he's experiencing or maybe a new concept from the Word.

I love that he humors me and my cooking. He's a good sport and will usually try something once. Then he rates it, and I decide whether or not to make that again. I love that. I love that he always notices all the work I do around the house. This is so affirming to me. It helps me feel like all I do is not in vain. I love that he helped me see I'm a dog person. I love that he cuddles with Gilbert.

He is an amazing man, and I am so blessed to call him mine. I am forever grateful to my Abba Father for watching out for me and helping me to wait for my Prince. I am thankful for happy endings, even when the middle gets kinda sticky at times. I didn't want to gross you all out and tell you that I love that he's the best kisser in the whole world, but I guess I just did anyway.

Well, it's true.

Happy Anniversary, Aaron. You complete me. I love you fully and can't wait to grow old with you.

I LOVE him...(part 1)

3 years ago, I had the privilege of marrying my best friend. I mean this in a totally non-cliche form of the phrase. Aaron Matthew Keathley really is my best friend.

(These wedding shots are taken by the fabulous Megan Williamson - aka my sis-in-law - of Rockwell Photography out of Indianapolis. You should call her.)

Who knew that one very sunny day in Clinton, IL (at the Nazarene church with the prettiest stained glass windows I've ever SEEN!), I'd meet MY Prince Charming while one of my dearest friends was practicing getting married to hers. Aaron said I walked up to him, put a quarter at his feet, said "Hi. You must be Aaron. I'm Joslyn. Stand on that quarter, would ya?" He says the first words out of my mouth were bossy, and I haven't stopped since. :-) He's funny, isn't he?

Though Mr. Keathley didn't have much to say to me that weekend, we began to get acquainted long distance through a mutual friend and the lovely world wide web. Though those days were exciting and fresh, I never once toyed with the possibility that anything would last. After all, I lived 4.5 hours away. How would this work for 2 strangers?

But God had a bigger plan. After 5-6 weeks of emails, internet conversations, and eventually phone calls, we planned a date. We would meet 1/2way, in Terre Haute, on a Sunday afternoon. I was excited (of course!), but still...didn't let the girl part of me take over yet. However, when I got a call on Friday afternoon to interview at a school 20 miles away from Aaron's hometown on the following Monday, I at first got the creeps and then got God-bumps. I ended up coming to IL Sunday a.m. and got to spend most of the day with Aaron, including dinner with Ryan & Bethany (whose wedding we met at). That was so special.

The rest, as we say in the cliche world, is history. I got the job, moved here, kept on dating Aaron and eventually fell in love. Our dating life was quite uneventful. We rarely argued, and I rather liked the "rose colored" view of life pre-marriage. The engagement and next 3 months were kind of a whirlwind. I had 96 days to plan a wedding, pay for a wedding, all while working and also relocating to a new home. I don't remember much about those engaged days, though I do remember finally having some disagreements. I know that I tended to be a "Bridezilla" in some forms, as the perfectionist in me wanted everything perfect AND free (which is mostly impossible). Thank God Aaron didn't back out on me.


(I love this pic! 2-3 months into our dating relationship at a cook-out. Taken by EE.)

Though I don't remember much about the engagement, I do remember every moment of the night before the wedding and the wedding day. I remember the text he sent me at 10 a.m. (1 hour before we were supposed to meet for pictures): "Will you marry me today?" I remember coming to our rehearsal with curlers in my hair (:-), all the pictures, Diet Mt. Dew, laughing and getting excited through the ceremony, seeing all the people I love in one place, hugging strangers, Kennedy all over the place up there on stage (including having communion with us), seeing Donna's face when we played James Taylor as our exit song, not getting to talk to everyone at the reception (sadly), getting cake smeared on my face (I kid you not), ice cream, bubbles, Nate speeding down country roads to see how fast Marmi's car would go, and then the whirlwind to get outta there...



More tomorrow...I wanna tell you why I love Aaron Keathley.

Touchy subject

I have a friend named Ann. She is an amazingly beautiful soul with a passion for adoption. I just read a post on her blog that moved me, and I hope moves you, as well.

Read Ann's blog that boldy asks if we, as believers, are REALLY against abortion. Touching.

Win Free Stuff

Check it out, girls! I'm selling 31 Gifts and Accessories now! I'm telling you - this stuff is great, which is the #1 reason I signed on!
First things first - what is 31? It's a great Christian-based company selling affordable and personalized (and cute) gifts, accessories, organizational tools, bags, purses, wallets, cards, etc. Please check out my website to look at the products yourself. Just click on the catalog button, and it will show up. You can zoom in on pages while you're there if you want.
Now, for the October special. This stuff is awesome, and I can't pass it up! I'm offering a door prize of 1 of 2 bags that I have. I have a mini organizer (awesome for many different things - I use mine for scrapbooking, one for cards (and cute pens that I use to personalize them), or you could use it for many different things) OR - I use mine for scrapbooking paper (it holds TONS), library books tote, clothes for an overnighter, etc. It's large, and also folds up for virtually no storage space (if needed).
So - here's the deal. You can qualify for the door prize in multiple different ways (as listed below):
* Spend $31 and get the Organizing Utility Tote for $5. Seriously. This bag is so versatile. I want 12. (Think Christmas gifts - I know I am!)
* Refer a friend to spend $31 and get the Organizing Utility Tote for $5 (just tell them to tell me your name, you will be entered in addition to them)
* Book a party for November or December (can be a book party or a home party - or somewhere neutral if you'd prefer)
* A friend you refer books a party in November or December (also can be a book party or home party). In this case, you'd both be entered, as well.
You can be entered to win multiple times, depending on how many friends you lure in (:-) or how many orders you can get! I will close the offer on 10/29.
Please help me start my business off with a bang. My goal is 12 of you to put in an order! These gifts are functional, cute, personalized, and did I mention ADORABLE?! Great for gifts or spoiling yourself a little bit. Let's do it! Send me an email (joslynranae@yahoo.com) or a message on FB to get in the drawing!