Saturday, July 16, 2016

The Power of Presence

I have been working on this post for a long time. Years, actually.

We tragically lost my in-laws two winters ago...42 days apart. Before that, we went through job loss and unemployment (for months and months). And really since we've been married, we've suffered with infertility. We've had fall out from lifelong friendships. We've walked through dark days when friends had to say goodbye to their own child.

The truth is...life is hard. Like...*really* hard.

Not that we should expect anything less. I am positive if we asked people to list their hardships, it would be hard to pen. But {sometimes} worse than the hardships themselves are the {well-meaning} people and their...phrases.

I know I'm not the only one here who is tired of all the clichés and phrases. You know the ones.

"God'll never give you more than you can handle."
"Everything happens for a reason."
"He/she is in a better place now."
"He gives the hardest trials to the strongest."
"God needed another angel."
"God brings us through trials to make us stronger."
"Forgive and forget."

...and the list goes on and on...

One cliché I have found to be true: your true friends do come out in the darkest of days. The people who will just come and sit. The ones who go out of their way to love you. I must say the people that have loved us through our struggles are my favorite people to this day.

The power of presence. It's a phrase I've been blowing around in my mind for a while. I'm not sure if I heard it somewhere or what. But boy. There sure is power in presence. I wish I had known sooner. I wish I had been more "there" for people I love when they were walking their darkest days. We all get caught up in how uncomfortable it is and what will we say and how will we smile ever again to them...

The truth is sitting with them is what they need. Maybe a listening ear. Maybe someone to whisk their children away so they can sleep. Maybe meals, maybe words, maybe hugs, maybe flowers. But for sure presence.

Presence is powerful. Don't ever question that...from one who has experienced it from all the angles.

Presence. Is. Powerful.